That bit in Hamlet where Hamlet halfway through a conversation whips out a fucking pipe out of NOWHERE (😅) and is like: "Will you play upon this pipe?" The other guy is hella confused and is like… "My lord, I cannot. I have not the skill". And then Hamlet is all: "BUT YOU THOUGHT I AM EASIER TO BE PLAYED ON THAN A PIPE, BITCH?!
Scene Information
Play: Hamlet
Act: III
Scene: 2
Characters present: Hamlet, Guildenstern (part of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern's confrontation with Hamlet)
This scene happens shortly after Hamlet stages "The Mousetrap" play to reveal King Claudius's guilt.
From the original play in modern English:
Hamlet: Will you play this pipe for me?
Guildenstern: My lord, I can’t. I don’t know how.
Hamlet: Please.
Guildenstern: Truly, I cannot.
Hamlet: I beg you.
Guildenstern: I have no skill at it, my lord.
Hamlet: It’s as easy as lying. You just cover the holes with your fingers, blow air through it, and music comes out. See—these are the keys.But you can’t play it, right? You lack the skill. And yet, you would try to play me. You think you can figure out all my secrets, play me from my lowest notes to my highest. I have music in me, but you can’t make it speak.
Do you think I am easier to play than a pipe? You may try to mess with me, but you’ll never truly play me.